Preparing for Adventures in Radiation

  

Two weeks ago I had a consultation with Dr. Ruth Williamson (above), the lead radiation oncologist and medical director at Huntington Hospital's Cancer Center. 

"One of your nodes was positive for cancer

and it was a pretty significent deposit 

and there was some extension of cancer cells

outside of that lymph node."

The entire first floor is made up of cancer testing and treatment facilities, all in a spa-like atmosphere. This is one of the radiation rooms:

 

And this is one of the waiting areas, with a soothing water feature.

Another nice touch in a waiting area:

"The two most common side effects are fatigue 

and radiation sunburn. If you have an area 

that peels, that can potentially be harmful 

and cause infection, so I want to hear from you about that right away if it happens 

so we can modify what we’re doing."

I had been quite anxious about this meeting with Dr. Williamson for two reasons: radiation was a scary concept to me with that great-unknown factor; and I had been given the gift of all of December off from cancer treatments to give my body a post-chemotherapy break, so I equated this meeting with having to face the reality of my situation again and I wasn't exactly anticipating that with relish.

My friend Judy Kent came with me so I wouldn't have to go through it alone and so I would have a second set of ears in the meeting. As we sat in a waiting area after checking in, I wanted to run for the door in a panic, although I didn't articulate this to Judy.

Why couldn't all this just be over with? Why did I have to deal with any of this at all? Why couldn't I just hide under my bed in a fetal position in hopes the reality bogeyman would take a flying leap?

But here we were, and that was that.

"With the CT scan I want to see where your affected breast tissue is. I want to include 

your lymph nodes. And then I’ll do a 
plan for treatment with a physicist."

After giving me a full examination from head to toe, including a breast exam, Dr. Williamson explained why I need radiation, what to expect and much more. It was somewhat overwhelming, which is why I was pleasantly surprised that she audio-recorded the meeting and handed me the CD when we were finished.

The purple-colored quotes sprinkled throughout this post are from that meeting, spoken by Dr. Williamson.

"If we don't treat your breast, you have 

a 30% risk of the tumor coming back 

smack dab in the same place."

OK, she had my attention. Gulp.

I went back a week later for a CT scan and to get four little tattoos on my left breast so the radiation beam can be targeted to the same precise spots each time.

"If I do have to come in from the front 

with an extra field, the possibility 

of lymphedema is what will 

keep me awake at night. We’ll just have to 

monitor you very, very closely." 

The radiation therapist, who will be with me throughout the treatment process, is a male. After he greeted me in the waiting area and escorted me to a CT scan room, he showed me where to change out of my blouse and bra and put on a gown.

He said he wanted me to know that if I preferred a female radiation therapist, he could arrange for that. He wanted to make sure I was completely comfortable.

No, I said. I trusted he had seen it all before.

Here's what the Philips Big Bore CT machine looks like:

Before the 10-minute CT scan, while I was lying on the table with my left arm extended up and to the side, Dr. Williamson marked four spots with a Sharpie where she wanted tattoos applied, drew some lines here and there and took some photos.

After the CT scan, during which I was inside and then outside and then inside and then outside the tube, my radiation therapist introduced me to the man who would be giving me the four little tattoos.

My only frame of reference with tattoos had been watching a couple of episodes of reality shows about tattoo parlors.

So I didn't really know what to expect. The tattoo technician didn't have one of those tattoo parlor drill machines after all. Instead, he had four thick needles, each filled with dye.

He never said one word. Not one. I couldn't see what he was doing, nor did I want to. As he felt around my skin a little bit, my radiation therapist suddenly blurted, "You're going to feel a stab!"

And a stab it was. A violent one. In four places. Four stabs. Thank goodness the radiation therapist said something as Tattoo Man was poised to strike, because Tattoo Man wasn't talking. Sadist.

"I do have some women who absolutely 

do not want to get the tattoos. They want 

the stickers, which can certainly be applied, 

but the problem is that stickers 

can fall off or shift a little bit."

Here's one of my little tattoos:

So now you're up to date. I'll go back one more time before radiation treatments begin, this time for a trial run on the machine without any beams beaming. 

"The only permanent skin color change 

will be the areola, the dark area 

around the nipple. It might end up 

somewhat lighter in color or even 

a lot lighter than the other side." 

Oh, joy.

Stay tuned for more Adventures in Radiation...



Photo credits: Ann Erdman, Huntington Hospital, Philips, Smarter Every Day

Adventures in Chemotherapy, Part 3 -- So long, farewell, auf wiedersehen, goodnight...

First, the good news:

After five long months (and seven months since being diagnosed), I completed my chemotherapy treatments on Nov. 24. (That's my oncology nurse Kristin in the photo above; the sign was made with loving hands by my daughter Jessica and granddaughter Kimberly.) Oh, and see my tiara?

I turned that final treatment into a celebration*.

The other good news: Two of the many side effects that plagued me daily for five months -- nausea and diarrhea -- are gone as of about a week ago.

One of the side effects that afflicted me for five months and forced me to stay in bed two to three days every week -- extreme, paralyzing fatigue -- is, thankfully, gone. The routine, daily cancer-related fatigue still lingers and will last up to a year or longer according to my medical oncologist Dr. Cynthia Martel.

And my "moon face" and weight gain caused by the powerful steroid Dexamethasone that I took for five months are just now beginning to diminish -- very slowly.

The not-so-good news: 

All of the other side effects are hanging on.

For example, I have neuropathy in my hands and feet as well as pain, discoloration and brittleness in my fingernails. I took this photo of my fingernails this morning (see the bands with darker color?):

It is such an odd sensation to have total numbness in my fingertips while, just on the opposite side, having such painful sensitivity in the dark part of my fingernails. There is only an inch or so of tissue in between, so it doesn't make a lot of sense to me. But then I'm not a physiologist. 

Another side effect that hasn't said goodbye yet is the truly annoying metallic taste in my mouth. The medical word for this is dysgeusia. I like the term metal mouth better. Try chewing on a ball of aluminum foil all day, every day. That's exactly what it tastes like to me. Using plastic forks and spoons instead of metal utensils has helped a little. 

For the first couple of months of my chemotherapy treatments I got really bad sores in the lining of my mouth and on my tongue. All that tissue is so delicate.

I'm still experiencing pain deep in the long bones of my arms, legs and shoulders -- femur, tibia, fibula, humerus, ulna and clavicle. I never know when it will strike, or in which bone(s). When I first complained about it to my oncologist, she said it was consistent with side effects of chemotherapy, but she ordered bone scans for good measure to determine whether the cancer had metastasized to one or more of my long bones. It hadn't, thank God.  

There are many other side effects that I look forward to bidding farewell to in the near or distant future, but I'll leave it at these descriptions for now.

My oncologist, Dr. Cynthia Martel, said it would take three to six weeks after the end of chemo for some of the side effects to dissipate and others will take their sweet time, in some cases up to a year or longer. 

In January I'll begin 30 radiation treatments, which I truly believe will signal the end of my cancer journey forever.

So long, farewell, auf wiedersehen, goodnight...

* On that last day of chemotherapy I asked my oncology nurse, Kristin, if everybody turns their last day into a celebration. She said she has been a registered nurse for 20 years, the last 12 of which have been in oncology, and she can count on one hand the number of her chemotherapy patients who have chosen to celebrate the occasion. She recounted the response of one female patient who, on her final day, said the following to her: "I hope you can sleep at night knowing that you poisoned me." It's shocking to me how many cancer patients choose to be bitter and cynical. That's just not my way.

Adventures in Chemotherapy, Part 2 -- Shining, Gleaming, Streaming, Flaxen, Waxen

My hair is beginning to grow back! The front and sides are a combination of white and light brown.

The back is almost all dark brown but very sparse, as you can see. There's a lot of scalp showing through:

Hair loss and chemotherapy go hand in hand. My oncologist, Dr. Cynthia Martel, told me there's no guarantee it will ever look the same again. But it might.

Will my thick, curly hair be gone forever, only to be replaced by a thin, mottled look?

Time will tell.  

My hair began falling out a week and a half after my very first chemotherapy treatment, which was on June 23. 

It was such a horrifying moment when, just minding my own business, I put a comb to my hair and a gigantic hunk came out. I didn't see that coming.

At the time, I was hospitalized in the oncology unit at Huntington for just over two weeks (long story). More and more hair fell out every day and was all over the pillow, sheets, floor, furniture, you name it.

Over the Fourth of July weekend I contacted my hairdresser, Patti Harmon, who owns Hair Studio in Montrose, and asked her if she could come to the hospital, take a pair of clippers to my hair and just get it over with. I figured losing my hair would be much less messy if it was very, very -- very -- short.

Although the holiday weekend was her family time and her shop was closed, she came right over and got the job done. She said this was a friend-to-friend moment, not a hairdresser-to-client moment. She wouldn't even accept a tip. I heart Patti Harmon!

She even brought me a hat and wore a white one in the same style herself. Solidarity!

There was still hair everywhere as it continued to fall out but now it was in tiny little lengths, not long, messy, stringy clumps. It made it much easier for housekeeping staff, too.

Less than a week later I was completely bald. (I lost my eyebrows a few weeks later.)

There was no choice but to embrace it and keep moving forward.

Which brings me to now.

It may take six to eight months for my hair to get to, say, shoulder length.

I'm patient. I can wait it out. And I have plenty of hats.

But someday...gimme a head with hair!

Adventures in Chemotherapy, Part 1 -- I Hardly Recognize Myself

I approached him at a get-together for a local nonprofit earlier this week.

I hadn't seen him in several months.

We served on a community board together a few years ago and have always greeted each other and chit-chatted when our paths have crossed since then.

The other night when I approached, he looked deeply into my eyes and said, "You look familiar to me but I'm having trouble placing you."

"Ann Erdman," I said, smiling. 

He was embarrassed. He hadn't recognized me in the hat that covered my bald head, the bare skin where eyebrows used to be, the look of fatigue on my face, my body a little stooped from bone and back pain.

"That's OK," I said. "I do look different. I barely recognize myself anymore!"

And then we chit-chatted just like old times.

Looking for Something To Do? Free Events September 19 to 25

Here are events scheduled Saturday, Sept. 19, to Friday, Sept. 25.

All events are free, so take a look -- and don't you dare say there's nothing to do in Pasadena!  

An emergency preparedness fair Saturday, Sept. 19, from 1 to 4 p.m. at McDonald Park will help you learn how your neighborhood and your household can be prepared for major earthquakes and other disasters. Sign up for special training, see related demonstrations, get emergency supplies and much more. Hosted by the Bungalow Heaven Neighborhood Association, the fair is open to everyone in Pasadena!

Exploring New Roads is a special fair Saturday, Sept. 19, from 1 to 5 p.m. inside and outside Central Library featuring displays of electric vehicles by Tesla, Chevy, BMW and Prius as well as presentations, videos, exhibits, children's activities and more, all related to the new boom in electric vehicle technology.

Taylor Mathews will perform acoustic, funk and pop Saturday, Sept. 19, at 7 p.m. in the courtyard at One Colorado.  

Dubbed "Ghana's Bob Marley," Rocky Dawuni will perform reggae Saturday, Sept. 19, at 8 p.m. -- the final summer concert at the Levitt Pavilion. A pre-concert festival will begin at 6:30 p.m. Bring a lawn chair or blanket and a picnic or purchase dinner at the park.    

Meet taiko drumming group Kodama Taiko Sunday, Sept. 20, from 1 to 4 p.m. at the Pasadena Japanese Cultural Institute, see them perform and then try some drumming yourself (they'll show you how).  

An LA Opera community educator will take visitors through Jake Heggie's modern classic Moby Dick Monday, Sept. 21, at 1 p.m. at the Pasadena Senior Center. Based on the Herman Melville novel, whaling ship Captain Ahab's relentless obsession with revenge against a rare white whale puts his crew in mortal danger. You do not have to a be a member of the Pasadena Senior Center to attend.

The Italian Job (1969, G) starring Michael Caine and Noel Coward will be shown on the big screen Wednesday, Sept. 23, at 1 p.m. in the Donald R. Wright Auditorium at Central Library. A team of career criminals attempt to pull off the biggest gold heist in history right under the noses of the Italian police and the Mafia.

Local author Roberta Martinez will present Pasadena: At the Corner of San Pasqual and Bandini Thursday, Sept. 24, at 7 p.m. in the Donald R. Wright Auditorium at Central Library featuring stories about the famed Elliott and Bandini families, the Greene Brothers, Father Throop and the roots of Caltech plus a Nobel prize winner or two.

Frozen (2013, PG) with the voice talents of Kristen Bell and Idina Menzel will be shown Friday, Sept. 25, at 7:30 p.m. (or when it gets dark) in the courtyard at One Colorado. When a queen uses her powers to turn everything into ice, her sister teams up with a mountain man, his reindeer and a snowman to change the weather.

Photo credits: Tesla Motors, Taylor Mathews, Glen Wilson, Rafu Shimpo, Calgary Opera, Brian's Film Review Blog, Pasadena Weekly, The Gamble House, Walt Disney Pictures

Looking for Something To Do? Free Events Sept. 12 to 18

Here are events scheduled Saturday, Sept. 12, to Friday, Sept. 18.

All events are free, so take a look -- and don't you dare say there's nothing to do in Pasadena!  

Raquel Rodriguez will perform saucy soul Saturday, Sept. 12, at 7 p.m. in the courtyard at One Colorado.

Avatar (2009, PG-13) starring Sam Worthington and Zoe Saldana will be shown on the big screen Saturday, Sept. 12, at 8 p.m. on the roof of the parking structure at 55 S. Lake Ave. A paraplegic U.S. Marine sent on a mission to the moon Pandora becomes torn between following orders and protecting the world he feels is his home. Come as early as 6 p.m. for deejay music and more and be sure to bring a beach chair. This event is hosted by the South Lake Business Association, and reservations/tickets are required.

Quetzal will perform East L.A. rock Saturday, Sept. 12, at 8 p.m. at the Levitt Pavilion. A pre-concert festival will begin at 6:30 p.m. Bring a lawn chair or blanket and a picnic or purchase dinner at the park.   

Admission to the USC Pacific Asia Museum is free the second Sunday of every month. On Sunday, Sept. 13, from 10 a.m. to 6 p.m. enjoy a spotlight on Mongolia with tours, art activities, performances and more.
 

Louie Cruz Beltran will perform Afro Cuban and Latin jazz Sunday, Sept. 13, at 7 p.m. at the Levitt Pavilion. A pre-concert festival will begin at 5:30 p.m. Bring a lawn chair or blanket and a picnic or purchase dinner at the park.  

Revenge of the Electric Car (2011, PG-13) will be shown on the big screen Wednesday, Sept. 16, at 1 p.m. in the Donald R. Wright Auditorium at Central Library. The documentary takes viewers behind the closed doors of Nissan, GM and Tesla Motors to chronicle the global resurgence of electric cars.

Celebrate Constitution Day with the local chapter of Daughters of the American Revolution Thursday, Sept. 17, at 1 p.m. at Central Library as they ring bells to celebrate Bells Across America, a national commemoration started in 1987. From 10 a.m. to 4:30 p.m. get a free pocket copy of the U.S. Constitution, see a special display and more.

Children are invited to learn the special art of eye patches, hook hands and sword making Thursday, Sept. 17, at 4 p.m. at Hastings Branch Library, then sail through the seven seas in search of treasure!

Admission to the Pasadena Museum of California Art is free the third Thursday (and first Friday) of every month. On Thursday, Sept. 17, from 5 to 8 p.m. enjoy the current exhibitions and everything else the museum has to offer.

The Music Man (1962, NR) starring Robert Preston and Shirley Jones will be shown on the big screen Friday, Sept. 18, at 1 p.m. at the Pasadena Senior Center. Harold Hill descends on River City, Iowa, with the intent of conning townspeople into the concept of forming a marching band. You do not have to be a member of the Pasadena Senior Center to attend.

Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory (1971, G) starring Gene Wilder and Peter Ostrum will be shown Friday, Sept. 18, at 7:30 p.m. (or when it gets dark) in the courtyard at One Colorado. An impoverished boy wins the opportunity to tour the most eccentric and wonderful candy factory of all.

SAVE THE DATE! 

Exploring New Roads is a special fair Saturday, Sept. 19, from 1 to 5 p.m. inside and outside Central Library featuring displays of electric vehicles by Tesla, Chevy, BMW and Prius as well as presentations, videos, exhibits, children's activities and more, all related to the new boom in electric vehicle technology.

Photo credits: TicketFly, Look Me5, Quetzal, Ruth Ozeki's Web World, Papercut Films, Legal Solutions Blog, Around You, Quick and Dirty Tips,   Paramount Pictures.